I feel like you have come along way since the last critique. I like the top one that you have to hard hat out of place and in color. I get that its out of place and that it doesnt fit in, but i dont think you need the words out of place. it is clear that the yellow hard hat doesnt fit in with the other ones. However i am confused why it is out of place. i dont remember your job, but i dont think it portrays your job-unless this is what you were going for.
I really appreciate your really great compositions and clean edges/lines. It looks like you're very comfortable with grid structures/geometric shapes.. which is something I can definitely relate to.
For the first piece, I kind of want to see the out place construction be way off the marker there. Like positioned way up top. OR... I'd like to see it cropped to just the construction hats. You have a lot of negative space that just looks completely empty. I'm not sure what you're trying to say with that negative space, but if your focus is that the orange hat is out of place, then I think you should close up on that.
Your integrative is obviously thought out well. Although very simple, I appreciate that the "3:45" is white while the "5:00" is black to indicate day & night without AM or PM written. The only thing I might suggest for this piece is adding a border around the white box for 3:45, or bleeding the black & white to the edges of the piece. But just a suggestion. I think it looks great the way it is.
I really like your second piece, with the times. It's super simple, and i like the idea of not signifying am or pm, just using white and black to signify morning and night. The problem I have, is that 3:45 in the morning is not sunny, or what I associated with white- 3:45 pm is though. and 5:00 pm, especially in the winter, is dark. So i had to think for a while before i realized you meant 3:45 am and 5 pm. I also think you could lie and make the time even worse... 3:45 to 9:45, or something crazy like that.
I feel like you have come along way since the last critique. I like the top one that you have to hard hat out of place and in color. I get that its out of place and that it doesnt fit in, but i dont think you need the words out of place. it is clear that the yellow hard hat doesnt fit in with the other ones. However i am confused why it is out of place. i dont remember your job, but i dont think it portrays your job-unless this is what you were going for.
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate your really great compositions and clean edges/lines. It looks like you're very comfortable with grid structures/geometric shapes.. which is something I can definitely relate to.
ReplyDeleteFor the first piece, I kind of want to see the out place construction be way off the marker there. Like positioned way up top. OR... I'd like to see it cropped to just the construction hats. You have a lot of negative space that just looks completely empty. I'm not sure what you're trying to say with that negative space, but if your focus is that the orange hat is out of place, then I think you should close up on that.
Your integrative is obviously thought out well. Although very simple, I appreciate that the "3:45" is white while the "5:00" is black to indicate day & night without AM or PM written. The only thing I might suggest for this piece is adding a border around the white box for 3:45, or bleeding the black & white to the edges of the piece. But just a suggestion. I think it looks great the way it is.
I really like your second piece, with the times. It's super simple, and i like the idea of not signifying am or pm, just using white and black to signify morning and night. The problem I have, is that 3:45 in the morning is not sunny, or what I associated with white- 3:45 pm is though. and 5:00 pm, especially in the winter, is dark. So i had to think for a while before i realized you meant 3:45 am and 5 pm. I also think you could lie and make the time even worse... 3:45 to 9:45, or something crazy like that.
ReplyDeleteThe second piece is amazing. It's exactly what doing something tedious feels like. All you think about is when it begins and when it will end.
ReplyDelete